Refreshing Product Naming Strategies

For quite a few years EvoStik have had a grab adhesive called STICKS LIKE SH*T
https://trade.evo-stik.co.uk/products/grab-adhesives/sticks-sht

They have now have a more powerful adhesive called THE DOG’S B*LL*CKS
https://trade.evo-stik.co.uk/product/dogs-bllcks

No debates about the merits / costs of the product please but isn’t it refreshing how it doesn’t have a cryptic or clever sounding name. A new naming strategy for tech products would be very welcome.

For example, the MacBook Pro with butterfly keyboard could be UTTER B*LL*CKS designed in California by ROBBING B*ST*RDS

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I wonder what you would call a very similar product from the same company that is designed in California and produced in Asia, but not built to withstand the Asian climates?
It begins with the rubber anti-slide ‘feet’ dropping off after less than three months of regular use, keys sticking (in the ‘down’ position, of course) and the screen being imprinted with an Impression of each and every key (I mean, you have to close the damned thing to transport it don’t you?) after just two months of use.

… and now with the free gift of a T2 chip that prevents 3rd party repair / replacement of substandard faulty components.

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… “at least you knew that the DOGS BOLX was made in Britain”

A proud moment for us all and one that we should be value above all other achievements. No one does bollocks like us.

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Yes, but you are sadly a distant second when it comes to robbing bastards. USA. USA. USA.

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